Not Quite a Poet…

Hello, wonderful readers. I’m currently at my summer program right now in Boston, but I’ve scheduled quite a few posts to be posted while I’m away, so please be sure to keep checking to see for anything new. 

As you may or may not know, I do indeed have a Wattpad (click here) to post my writing. I love to write. That’s probably quite obvious already, why else would I have a blog that’s literally all writing? I love writing on this blog, of course, but my biggest passion in writing is fiction as well as poetry. My poems are not breathtakingly wonderful, as fiction is most definitely my niche. They’re very all over the place and a little odd, but they’re me. I would definitely say they’re mostly quite dark. To me, all of my best writing comes out of darkness. I don’t really know how to explain it, but I feel that my writing isn’t sugarcoated or supremely “pretty”, I think of writing as art. And my art, just like any other, is supposed to make you feel something, naturally, and raw. It makes you think. That’s all I ask of you if you ever read my writing. I’m being honest and raw. I’m trying to be genuine.

So, in honor of this, I’ve decided to share some of my poetry with you all. If you’re too lazy to take a quick look at my Wattpad, all is well, hopefully this will sway you. Please just read the poem “Train” before clicking off of this page. It isn’t a typical poem, with rhyming and such. It’s more of a short story composed into a poem. Most importantly, as I do trust most of you but certainly not all, please do not steal the poems. I have put much work and effort into it and stealing it is just sort of… well, bitchy. Please do not be bitchy. I mean, if you want to steal it, I’m completely flattered… but please don’t. If anyone needs feedback or advice with writing, feel free to email me at (I’m getting a new one soon). Thank you, as always. I love you if you take time to read my little blog, and I’m always happy to read yours as well. So, go ahead and click on the wattpad link, and I will honestly appreciate it so much. 

It’s a beautiful day to dream.





Selfie Appeal

Selfies. They’ve become a commonly used, culturally known word in our society. Having a good selfie technique is like winning the internet Nobel prize. And yes, that is almost laughably sad, when you see the truth of the matter: We take millions of pictures of ourselves, posing in different, socially acceptable ways, and post them, hoping to gain attention/affection and be noticed, captioning them “Excuse my ugliness” in the hopes that someone will correct us, with the biggest threat being the amount of times people tap the “like” and “comment” button. And after all of this, the result is usually unintentional narcissism, with whispered words, if the picture is not acceptable to our peers, of how the person is “trying too hard”. If the selfie is good, though, then whispers still continue, of how “conceited” that person is. We crave acceptance, yet is there any, really? Today, unfortunately, things like the number of likes we receive, our Instagram ratios, our amount of followers, define who we are and how loved we are. The goal of today’s culture is not to be loved deeply, but only to be loved widely (thanks for this line JG), by people who do not even truly know who we are, only what they see and perceive by our social media. I, myself, am not trying to be overly superior by saying that I am not guilty of this. Of course I am. I used to be one of the most Instagram- obsessed, sadly. But now? I literally do not give a shit, because I’ve seen firsthand that no matter how hard you try, there is no perfect end result. I have friends who, no joke, it seems like they would sell their soul to get a certain amount of likes on their selfie. Listen, I’m not saying that posting a selfie is always conceited, sometimes it is a way for someone to be expressive or a way for them to quietly shine through insecurity. Creativity is delightful. But what certainly isn’t so delightful is this insane obsession we have with each other’s faces/bodies. If I want to post a selfie, let me post a damn selfie. Nobody can post anything on Instagram without getting instantly criticized, every flaw scrutinized and highlighted by others. This is what kills me. I’ll be with my friends, when suddenly one of them will whip out their iPhone, pull up a certain picture from a certain person, and criticize the picture, letting us all know how socially unacceptable certain selfie methods are. Usually, I roll my eyes and shut my opinionated self up before I say something a bit tooooo snarky. But what I really would love to do is yank the phone out of the person’s hand, and break into the song “Mean” by T-Swift, because, let’s face it, who doesn’t love a classic Taylor hit at perfectly appropriate timing with choreography and her signature head-whipping. Anyyyyways, I really don’t enjoy the extent of this once-fun trend. Although, now, I’m not quite sure you could even call it a trend. It’s lasted a long time, already, and it’s referenced recently in countless TV shows, movies, in live conversations, and even songs (Yeah, you know the one).

So what’s my personal opinion on the selfie game? I hate the obsession, the care that goes into it, the competition. But I’m guilty of it as well. Selfies are like drugs, honestly, they’re extremely harmful but so addictive. Getting a “good” amount of likes gets me on this weird high like nothing else. And so, what’s the solution to this? To stop being so damn judgmental of everyone’s selfies. They’re pictures. How do they affect us, remotely, or at all? 

Don’t up your selfie game. Lower it, and so will everyone else.


Sometimes It Happens

“Not everything happens for a reason. Sometimes life just sucks.” -Alexa Chung I was recently perusing Tumblr, something I haven’t done in quite a while, and I came across this most fabulously accurate quote by one certain fashionista/author/model/perfect person, (in case you haven’t seen, it’s my idol, Alexa!). I don’t know if you’ve ever had what I call the “bat experience”, but it can be pretty damn amazing and pretty damn terrible at the same time. Basically, it’s when you come across some random picture/quote/gif/WHATEVER on Tumblr, and you suddenly have this sort of shaking epiphany that no, you are not alone in how you feel or think. Someone out there, somewhere, whoever it may be, has had the same experiences as you. Is it always a good thing? Hell no. But is it comforting? Extremely. I call it the “bat experience” because to me, the impact feels as if I am literally getting hit in the face with a metaphorical bat. Anyways, I did in fact have the Bat with this quote. See, I’ve recently been reading and studying quite a bit about the reality of our insignificance. Amongst these books, theories, and articles, I have found a great deal of truth in. I’ll go more into detail about what exactly these books are later on, but I’ll try to give you the general gist of the whole thing. (Keep in mind, I am no award winning scientist) We, as human beings, naturally all believe that there is a greater reason for us all. We typically believe that the Earth is placed exactly where it is for some grand plan, that the sun is there specifically to provide for us, that everything that we are and have become, every experience, every birth and every death, are for some purpose. We all desire a common goal: a purpose. I hate to break it to you, if you haven’t already figured it out, but, that’s just a whole load of bull-crap. Yes, we are humans, we are somehow miraculously able to breathe and live and die, but so what? The universe doesn’t care. The universe doesn’t anything, it just… is. We just… are. We are humans, because that’s just what is. I’m not extraordinary, but I am. See, it’s extraordinary that we are even able to be, but our being is not incredible. Does that make a hint of sense? I feel like this is an opinion, but I also feel like Alexa is also stating a fact. When shit happens, as it inevitably always does, (Thanks, Forrest Gump) it comes out of nowhere and usually to the best of people. You could be a good person, someone who always tries to do the right thing, but guess what- that doesn’t matter. Not one person lives a life with no suffering. And typically, that suffering has no reason. A person does not get cancer to learn about life, they get cancer because life sucks. And cancer is a monster, but sometimes it’s stopped and sometimes it’s not. You don’t get punished by breaking a bone, by getting sick, by anything of that sort. Good people are not getting into car accidents because “God needs angels”. They are getting into car accidents because they are accidents. You can’t control life, but there is no purpose to that. There are just rules of the universe, not for any certain reason, just because. I know this sounds awfully controversial, and like I should have some research to back up my theories, but these are not theories of mine. I have nothing against religion, of course, but I simply believe in science and what I’ve just said. I am not encouraging/discouraging anyone to be religious. Honestly, do whatever makes you happy. What I am saying is that religion cannot be proved just as a “purpose for our world” cannot be proved. Religion just is. We just are. See, nothing about life is “right” and nothing about life is “wrong”. We have morals, values, that we as humans believe will take us ultimately to our purpose in life, but nothing is actually as planned as we believe it to be. And so, Alexa is completely right. Of course I get frustrated with life, often going bonkers when shit happens for no apparent reason. But I’ve learned that usually, there is no reason, and I have to accept that. I don’t have to be happy about it, but I just have to accept that there is literally nothing to be done about it. The universe isn’t a devil or an angel, it doesn’t actually have manipulations or motives, it just is. And that, that is something I like to hold onto in moments of panic. How insignificant we are is actually pretty damn calming, if you stop to think about it. Riiiight… So I apologize if I just completely sounded like I’m trying to be some type of philosopher. Because philosopher, I ain’t. Basically, as I’m guessing my words were a little jumbled, here’s what I’m trying to tell you all, in a nutshell: Stop thinking that the universe hates you. The universe only hates you if you let it.